Dream Journal

Context: This is maybe a year or so after I broke up with Joleen.

I’m in this abandoned house in the woods. Some friends are there — Wayne, Dom, and others. For some reason I didn’t have any pants. Joleen suddenly shows up. Someone else runs to hug her and she gives them a weak hug. Then I step up to her and we embrace strongly. She kisses my cheek, then my nose. I kiss her chin, then we just decide to forget this denial thing and we kiss passionately on the lips. Then I read a letter she gave me. It listed everything she’s done with this one other guy since we broke up, which was just kissing and hugging. Then there’s her list of what we had. I look it over and it’s pretty complete. Soon Joleen and I are on the floor, kissing, entwined. Then after a few minutes I begin reading another letter from her, saying how happy she was that we were getting back together.

She was about to go somewhere in her car, and I called to her from the balcony. “Joleen, I really didn’t intend, I didn’t mean for us to. . . . ” I held out the letter and she turned and ran towards her car. I called out after her. “Wait!” She stopped, turned around, and said “What?” I didn’t know what to say. She ran off into the woods and I followed her. We ran through this big forest for a while and eventually came to this other house. I forget the dialog on the way. I realized that it was a home for those in pain. The whole place was dimly lit. Tree was there, with a terribly sad look on his face. “Hi, Ben. I told ya I saw her here.” I introduced myself to some guy sitting across the couch from Joleen and I. He looked sick. I leaned over to Joleen and she moved away. She said “There’s not a whole lot of touching allowed here.”