Dream Journal
June 5, 1997
Dreams: [another dream of jealousy in The Tower, disguised as Santa Fe]
Part two is on some big bridge, and Liz is following Rebecca and me blurting out comments about how I cheated on Rebecca a long time ago and should tell her. So I finally did (I was making it up via suggestion) and she was crushed, but then got over it quickly.
In one part, I was getting my face surgically realigned. This doctor took out my eyeballs and held them in front of me. “These are your eyes. They are bad at seeing because (and here I thought he was going to blame my father) . . . because of your father’s anger.” He flashed pictures of me unable to express certain things to Dan and then my face twisting with anger. The surgery was him putting my eyeballs back in my head.
Suggestion: I never cheated on Rebecca. In a dream, however, I accepted the suggestion of it as if it were true. This is more likely the less lucid we are. So we continue on under false assumptions.
For her part, it seems like her waking self was momentarily awakened to react to it, but then it fell back asleep.
Father and Sight: Either I picked up what the doctor was going to say before he said it (and before it was strung out into words), or my expectation affected what he said next. In waking life at this time I often felt frustrated about my horrible vision.
Doctors!: See? Doctors are horrible!